This is it! The other day I sat down and pulled out my orange book. My orange book is a hard-covered sketch notebook. The kind with the fancy card stock paper that you think twice about before writing on. I bought the notebook one year ago with grand plans of writing down quality thoughts. You know the casual things like my new year resolutions, my stoic wisdom, and the cure for cancer. So far I’ve filled approximately two pages. I’m going to need to bump the wisdom and cancer-curing till next year. One of the resolutions, or goals if you will, was to write every month. Three thoughts, splattered across a page in an attempt to bring clarity and closure to the happenings of the previous month. This is it. This is the 12th month.
I’m not sure why I’ve waited so long to write this final post. I think I might be looking for some kind of grand realization in these writings. Maybe I’m simply markedly better at procrastination. I can say that until this commitment to writing every month I didn’t realize how many goals I set are very difficult to measure and that even fewer still extend a full calendar year. Long-term goals are healthy, my writing process is not. But who knows, maybe I’ll take another year to refine that. Let’s wrap this up.
Thing 1: Sanding Woes
I have a friend who’s pretty tough. Before he was a firefighter he was a Navy Seal and a police officer. He has the kind of life experience you only get by getting chewed up and spit out of various demanding circumstances. When we graduated fire academy we were all tasked with stating a favorite quote or saying. He chose to quote Nelson Mandela by saying. “I never lose, I either win or I learn.” For whatever reason, this quote stuck in my head. And for good reason.
There’s really not that much that happened this month that didn’t involve sawdust. This past month Jen and I set about redoing our 70-year-old hardwood floors. Armed with a positive attitude, a Sunbelt rental sander, and a combined 0.0 years of total experience we set about gathering sawdust in our hair, earbuds, eye sockets, and socks. We got sawdust inside the refrigerator, we got sawdust on the walls, we even got sawdust in the sanding bag that was supposed to catch all the sawdust. When the dust settled we began prepping to stain. Two happy homeowners applying pre-stain like there’s no tomorrow. After the actual stain was applied our learning began. We learned that we missed a significant amount of drum marks (Sanding indents on the floor where the belt made initial contact.) We learned how bad we were at blending edges and corners to make the floor the same color. And to top it all off we learned that a wet tack cloth designed to take the dust off will in fact leave streak marks that make your floors look like they were stained by two 9-year-old children. Jen and I entered the five stages of grief when we realized we would have to sand it all down again and start over. We took turns descending into the pits of despair. And we could’ve stayed there. Thankfully I’m blessed with a wife that finds joy in every situation. She laid on the floor and giggled. “We’re two little idiots!” she said. We began to laugh at how impressively bad it looked.
I recently was asked why we didn’t pay someone to refinish our floors from the start. My reply was this “I never lose, I either win or I learn.” There’s a significant amount of learning going on in the Shetler household, and for that I am grateful. Also, if you’re still somehow reading this, you might want to buy stock in a sandpaper manufacturer, because we’re about to do some more “learning.”
Thing 2: Books
I never thought I would do this. I never thought I would be the person that is sharing their reading list like it’s some sort of gift to humanity. Yet, as I think over the past few months of writing I know that the books that I consumed impacted my writing. Maybe not in profound ways, but definitely in some way. So since I cannot deviate from the parallel structure of three things, here are three book recommendations.
Most influential read : “Beyond Order 12 More Rules for Life” by Jordan Peterson.
Most practical read: “The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry” by John Mark Comer.
Most fun read: “Agent Zigzag” by Ben MacIntyre
These books range from clinical psychology to Christianity in the modern-day to true stories of a WWII double agent. Let’s just say they are all much better authors than I. If you are still reading this feel free to send me your recommendations. (I know it sounds like I’m starting a suburban moms book exchange… And maybe I am.)
Thing 3: Truth Runs
I was having a bad day. I had been less than successful at accomplishing much of anything useful. And now I was resentful. Resentful of myself for lacking the discipline and resentful towards anyone who wanted to change my current situation. It was much more comfortable to soak in the lukewarm dissatisfaction of unmet potential than to get up and do anything about it. Then Jen called. She knew I was having a bad day and she wanted to help. We set about sparring like to boxers trying to get the other to take their defense down. I do this cute thing where I pretend that nothing is wrong. Jen wasn’t fooled.
“Let’s go running she said.”
“Um, I think it’s supposed to rain,” I replied.
“That’ll be fun!” She countered.
“You don’t have running clothes at work,” I stated.
“You could meet me at the trail with clothes,” She offered.
Clearly, I was not going to get out of this. I agreed and we planned to run a nearby trail. I just hoped we could get it over quickly.
As we ran I could feel my barriers start to come down. I told Jen that I had been feeling sorry for myself and didn’t know how to reset. I tried my best to be truthful with how I was feeling instead of building more walls.
We both began to smile as we ran through the trees.
By the end of the run, my legs were tired but my spirit was strong. We both agreed that this was what was needed to properly communicate and break down the issues we were having. We dubbed it a “Truth Run.” Jenny said that my original name suggestion “Runs of Truth” sounded like a medical condition containing diarrhea. We have since gone on five or so “Truth Runs” and each one has been an amazing way to reset and connect. Maybe you don’t consider yourself a runner but I’m sure you can find something to connect through. Truth walks, truth ice cream cones, truth skydiving. Whatever it is, push your person out of their room. I’m sure they’ll eventually appreciate it. I know I did.
Final Thoughts:
I think you’re a wonderful person.
Song suggestion: “Just So You Know” ~ Charley Crockett
Until next time,
C.S
